My sister thinks I'm acting like a zombie, my mom thinks I'm getting better, but am not quite myself yet. Me? I think I'm almost back to normal and the meds might be making me into a zombie. I wish I didn't have to take them, but in the end, I know it's the best thing for me, so I don't have another relapse.
Work is going ok, but I'm afraid that I'm moving too slowly for a cashier, and that it might be too early to go back to work. But my unemployment was about to run out, bill collectors are biting my neck, and sitting at home feeling sorry about myself was getting old. I am scared because I'm stressed out almost every day before I work, and I know that work related stress, mostly about thinking that I'm failing, is one of my triggers.
I've never really been a social butterfly, but I'm more so when I'm manic. The meds have leveled out my mood, but I'm feeling a lack of being able to show emotions. The fact that my family and friends, or what's left of them after all of this, are all starting families of their own makes me feel left out, like a third wheel. But I'm ok being single, for now at least, until I feel like myself again.
Yes, I have a mental illness, but I'm still the same old Adam, or at least I hope to be again soon. Hopefully it will be a happy medium between manic and depressive, I just want to be me again.
-- Post From My iPhone 3G[S]
Location /may/ vary...
Location:25th St SE,Salem,United States
